113: ‘Being the Change’ as a Leader

We want something to happen “out there”, in the world. We want to change another, we want to change our circumstances (partner, job, finances, etc.), so we get busy DOING – fixing, forcing and making something happen in the world – and it rarely works and often creates more stress for everyone involved.

There is an alternative and it’s encapsulated in Gandhi’s quote, ‘BE the change you wish to see in the world’.  We often assume this means – go do something ‘good’, save the whales, pick up trash, treat someone well. While those are important, and part of what is meant, there’s SO much more. There’s the inner aspect.

What does that mean? To do the “inner work”, to change you in order to change the world? This is the most powerful form of change, and those that walk this path are the best leaders on the planet.

Maren and Stephanie dive into what ‘being the change’ means for leaders and in our everyday lives and how we can begin, or continue, on the path to real, lasting, powerful change – internally and externally.

  • 00:41 A mother, her son and Gandhi
  • 05:13 Outer actions represent inner thoughts, changing them can create instant outer transformation
  • 06:15 Gandhi’s inner leadership
  • 09:16 The inner leadership practice to get what you want in the outer world
  • 16:17 Still not good enough. How do we break the cycle?
  • 21:00 Leadership: the condition of perfection
  • 25:16 The ‘time in’ and the Leadership questions to create real change


(26:48) Here’s my process:

First, where am I doing what I’m seeing in this person? Where am I acting out that way that I might be unconscious? 

Second: Where am I doing that to myself, I might not be doing it to someone else, but I might be doing it to myself. 

Third: Where am I not being compassionate and loving towards others who are doing it and they don’t know that they’re doing it? So I often will look at that. 

Fourth: Who am I being called to become? Is there a quality, more compassion, more patience, more whatever, that I’m being asked to embody? And is there a way I can practice that to evolve?


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